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Thursday, March 10, 2011

6 months...So Fast


Moments are treasures to me and I feel that life should be experienced to the fullest in each moment, within the moment. I want my experiences to really be enjoyed and landmarked in my heart, not just a shrug of the shoulders type of normalcy. Even though, especially as a mom, I find myself having to make a concious choice several times a day (or night) to think differently than just the norm. Each second should be taken advantage of to the fullest.

I want to soak up every second of everything with Káel right now. Even at 4 am when I'm dead beat tired and my little boy needs me to snuggle him for a few minutes...um, yes. Oh dear Lord yes. That happened last night. My teething little sir needed me to hold him and comfort him. All of a sudden I found myself with his head nuzzling in my neck, one hand clinging to one shoulder of my pajamas and the other playing with the curls on my neck...he was breathing heavy and tired sighs that had those delicious hints of happiness because momma was there. Everything was ok. Me? I was in the highest heaven. All of a sudden as I realized what was happening in this glorious moment, my tiredness was forgotten and my blurry eyes widened in smiles. He was enjoying my love for him.

Fast change.

6 months old...really? How did this happen so fast?

One day he's happy content in my lap with one little, simple toy. The next day he's scootin' across the floor exploring the kitchen (oh, goodness...) and holding his own bottle and thinking himself quite the stud for doing so. ;) No more swaddling for this big boy...it's all sprawled out and upside down from here on out. Oh, did I mention he eats like a little horse? He LOVES food. His favorite toy is a big, hard, plastic Woody doll from Toy Story and his Fisher Price milk truck (without the milk cans in it.). Haha. All of his little likes and dislikes that are starting to show through make me giggle.

do you see the milk dribbles all over his face! eee! So sweet.

Gah, what's happening to me? Jess, you're lost. You're lost in a tidal wave of love and emotions that have never hit you like this before. I look at Sam when he is cuddling Forest and I see that he is as lost as I am, and it's wonderful. In the middle of this wonderful is a little bit of sadness, at least for me. We aren't going to have these moments forever. These moments, of course will be replaced by more amazing times, different but amazing still the same. But...different.


Oh, sweetheart...my little man, I can't begin to tell you how much I fall in love with your little face each morning and how you have messed up my whole world with love. Yep, I'm crying right now. You'll probably shake your head and give me loving laughs later in life when you hear me tell you about all this, but...I've become a mushy mommy. I never cried like this before, I promise. It was you. All you little sir. But, I think it's a rather good thing. (Now, since I stopped breast feeding you, I don't ruin my shirt every time I have one of these moments, I just ruin my makeup.) haha. I love my life, I love you baby boy.

13 comments:

  1. Agreed. Wholeheartedly :) Yay for our awesome beautiful babies :)

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  2. Oh my goodness! You've just made me tear up, Jess! Sharing "mushy" with you, right now!!

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  3. This little boy makes my heart sing. So happy to have both of you beauties in my life. xoxo

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  4. And now you have me crying with you! As a new mom (a mere three weeks!), I finally understand what all the other mommies out there have been telling me for years. Nothing could have prepared me for this kind of love...for this amount of love. My cup runneth over!

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  5. He is a joy and a wonder to behold... and so are you!

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  6. He is just so wonderful. I love that little Forest.

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  7. he is unbelievably sweet.

    i had some mushy moments earlier, and i'm only a fill-in nanny for when my sister is out of town. sweet little 2 year old boy sleeping on my chest. huge compared to a 6 month old, but when he woke up and still wanted to snuggle by my side. talk about warm fuzzies.

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  8. I am so glad I found your blog a few moments. Your writing and the moments of your life you share are truly beautiful.
    I cannot wait to experience that amazing shift that motherhood bring myself someday, but until then, I'm so happy there are blogs out there like yours :)

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  9. Bang goes my heart! Your writing is so lovely :)

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  10. well said, love. i am right there with you. he is seriously a sweetheart!

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  11. Such beautiful pictures :) Your love for your son is is apparent in the way you write about him. It's a joy to read!! :)

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