Scariest Night Ever

Night before last was one of the scariest that I've experienced so far in this new chapter in life called, motherhood. Actually it was one of  the scariest thing in my life, I think ever, motherhood or not. 

I had a sinking feeling in my gut as I ran upstairs to check on my Forest boy. Something wasn't right. He'd only been in his crib for 10 min or less, but he'd been acting funny since dinner about 15 min before. He kept coughing, and itching his eyes, he wouldn't finish his food or drink anything. Or was he just sleepy and rubbing his eyes in the dramatic way he always does? I was replaying in my mind anything that was out of the ordinary that might cause his discomfort. Yeah, he was teething but this was different. Oh my gosh! I gave him two of THE smallest bites of my peanut butter sandwich that I was eating while feeding him! I reached for the overhead light in his room, of course the light bulb was blown out. I looked over his crib with only his nightlight to see him tossing pitifully in bed, his face looked strange. I grabbed him and he was coughing and as I rushed downstairs. The fear of this being an allergic reaction to peanuts terrified me. I had friends in school that almost died from this because their throat would swell up and they couldn't breathe. Kael's face was so red and so swollen, there were blotches on his arms and he looked scared.

Sam had run up to grab some dinner at Chick Fil-A, so I was at home alone. I kept going from the living room to the kitchen, back and forth trying to figure out what to do. Where the *bleep* is my iphone!? Should I call 911, should I just run up to the urgent care right around the corner? Should I call Sam? WHERE IS MY PHONE?! This HAD to be from the peanut butter. Within 5 min. of me giving him 2 tastes (which he LOVED) he had started rubbing his eyes really hard, and coughing. He wouldn't drink his water or milk. He wouldn't eat any of his other bits of dinner that he really liked. All of a sudden as I'm thinking this and a million other thoughts in a 20 second time period, Kael projectile vomits like I have NEVER seen him do before, all over the floor, himself and me. Sam came in the back gate and I rushed out to show him Kael. When he saw Kael's face he said, "Oh my God." I told him what I thought  was going on and we ran out the door to take him to the Urgent Care. It seemed unreal. We were told to go to the children's hospital and take him to the emergency room. We chose to drive instead of being taken by ambulance. We were in the car praying, and I kept beating myself up for giving him peanut butter. I looked down at my feet and realized I had forgotten my shoes, nice.  Please God, let my baby be ok. I called my midwife to get her advice and her opinion. She encouraged us to absolutely go to the ER.

walking into the ER at Levine Children's Medical

By the time we got to the ER that was 20 min. away, his face had gone down a ton and I could tell he wasn't scared anymore. It was still swollen but not nearly as much as it had been.  Another 10 min. and he was flirting with the nurses, puffy eyed-face and all. My little trooper. They put us in a room, gave him a big dose of Bendryl, some fluids and waited to make sure he was improving. About 2 hours later he was doing a million times better, the medicine had kicked in and after playing with some toys they gave him, he passed out on me in the rocking chair. After what I told them, they agreed it was a peanut allergy and told us to make an appointment with our pediatrician (which we are doing tomorrow). Everyone was SO nice to us while we were there, it was very comforting. 

We got home, put him to bed, he was out cold, little darlin'. I heated up our now cold Chick Fil-A that had been forgotten and tossed on the table when we left. Sam and I sat there quietly eating and I started to cry. I had been so focused on being strong for my baby and having a clear head so I could think and respond the way  we needed to that, I didn't emotionally process what had just happened. I had felt panic for 5 minutes when I first found him and after that I was in mom mode. I called my mom on the way home and she was googling peanut allergies. She told me some babies don't show serious signs for over an hour. I realized that I could have put him to bed and not realized what was happening. Thank God he showed symptoms that early and I noticed them.  Sam kept telling me to not beat myself up, but it was and is hard not to. I'm just so thankful that he is ok! I found my cell phone smooshed between the couch cushions. I had several texts from friends telling me that they were praying and if we needed them they were there for us. We have the most amazing community surrounding us and when one of us needs prayer or help, it's there before you can even ask. 

swelling had gone down a ton...my poor little sweetie

Well, somehow I missed the memo that peanut butter including any and ALL peanut products should be withheld from your baby until they are at least 1 yr. old. To be on the safe side, you should wait until they are 2 or 3.  We don't have anyone on either side of our family that has a peanut allergy, Kael hasn't had any vaccines, he's not allergic to anything else that we know of. He eats mostly organic food...it's just so bizarre to me. If any of you guys have any insight or knowledge about this sort of thing, I welcome any sources of info or advice. We have to carry what's called an Epi Pen now. One in the diaper bag and one here at home. It's a big shot in case he has another reaction, to make sure he can breathe. It all is and sounds so scary to me. All of this is new territory for me. 

'

notice my socks...compliments of the nurse upon seeing my very dirty barefooted feet. 

waiting to go home. we hadn't brought anything, no bottle, no nothing...thankfully a sweet nurse brought back some toys for him to play with. (they had been cleaned.) 

I started a new hospital fashion trend. Who says these ugly things can't come in style? ;) 

Now you know the reason behind the title of this post. I'm going on a new quest to research this booger of peanut sensitivity. Again, I would love to hear any feedback or experiences you have to share on the subject. Little boy is totally fine now. Yesterday he was a little whoozy and tired but today he's as feisty as ever! We are going to look at a couple of houses today in the ongoing house hunt! Have a lovely week pretties!